Destination Unknown

I am hesitant to begin this post because I don't have clear thoughts at this time.

Perhaps you have noticed that I like things clear, precise, and tidy.

I've spent a lot of time over the last couple of years trying to tidy up the mess that my life had become.

The loss of friendships I put into a box called acceptance and wrote "forgiven" across the top. This was difficult, but necessary.

The loss of ministry and position I put into a box and began a list on the outside of valuable lessons learned in the process of laying down my position. This was good too.

There were other things, like vision, hope, dreams, gifting, and zeal that I put into boxes and simply wrote DANGER across the top. Then I attempted to live a safe life without these things.

In the end, I crawled into a very small box and hoped that in doing so I could fit somewhere. I just wanted to fit, somewhere.

This past weekend tipped all my boxes upside down and scattered everything around.

I can't continue in my walk with God without hope, dreams, and passion. However, if I allow these things back into my life, I can't fit into the small box.

So, once again, I have no direction. I guess it's time I learned to trust God to figure out where we fit.

Graham said,

"The Lord won't give you direction so that you can feel secure. You are to be developing your sensitivity to the Father. He wants you to develop greater prophetic capability.

The journey is always about relationship. There is no substitute for trust and sensitity to His Spirit. You have to find your identity and inheritance on the journey."